One of the first things you hear when people find out you're pregnant is, "Life is going to change for you!" Of course I, with my overly confident outlook on life, said, "Well, it's only going to change as much as we let it change. Just because we're having a baby doesn't mean we have to stop living!"
Ha! Oh so naive and optimistic me of a few weeks ago! (Actually, no- it was a very angry, moody, and miserable me of a few weeks ago. The naive/optimistic me was much, much longer ago.) Not only have I stopped "living" the way I was used to (who knew that having a baby perma-attached to your bosom would limit your ability to just jump in the car and go to the grocery store anytime you needed to?), I've stopped sleeping, eating, and even grooming the way I was used to. (I finally was able to brush my teeth and put on my contacts at 3 this afternoon. Maybe that's why he was so cranky today- mama's all-day-morning breath probably wasn't such a treat.)
Granted, I still have a newborn and am still trying to figure out this whole, "Oh-My-Lanta- I am a MOTHER now!" thingy and I do need to give both myself and my baby time to actually adjust to all of the changes that have occurred in our lives (Me: having a tiny little being completely dependent on me for everything in his life. Him: getting mama back for all of the gas noises he heard throughout the nine months in her belly. Seriously- he totally did a lift the leg, grunt, and push out a fart while nursing yesterday. I laughed so hard, it startled him awake. That's our boy!)
One of the changes I've been dealing with is his inability to sleep in his crib at night. Or during the day. I know newborns need to feel secure and there's really no way you can "spoil" them at this age, so I don't feel entirely too guilty for co-sleeping with him at this point. I never thought I'd let him sleep with us since I was totally afraid of smothering him in his sleep. And because I never thought I'd be one of "those" moms. However, we tried the whole swaddling him and shushing him to sleep from Happiest Baby on the Block. (TOTAL PACK OF LIES, by the way!) But he completely HATES being swaddled. He would cry bloody murder every time we would try it and then he'd grunt and fuss and wriggle his little arms out so that he could sleep with them above his head. If I let him sleep with me, he actually sleeps! Me? Not so much. But I'm adjusting. The crazy thing is that *I* actually feel comforted when he's sleeping with me instead of in his bed or swing. At first it was a pain to keep him with me. Now? I really enjoy it. Didn't see that one coming.
|FINALLY taking a nap in his crib today! (Nooo! I need you! I mean, you need me, remember?!?)|
Another change is in the way I want to spend my day. It's really weird. Before he was born, I'd have no qualms spending a day off in bed or on the couch either crocheting, napping, reading, surfing the net- just being totally
Actually, I think it's the fact that I now have no choice in the matter. Before, I could do chores around the house if I wanted to. ("If'" being the operative word.) Now? That choice is gone- I'm at the mercy of this tiny little hungry baby in order to do anything at all. That's another change I didn't see coming. I'm pinned to my bed and have the prime opportunity to do everything I normally enjoy doing guilt free and all I can think about is, "I really need to clean the bathroom." I don't know who I am anymore!!
Well, I'm going to take advantage of his napping on me (I was burping him and he crashed on my chest. I love it!) and finish my Half Granny Scarf I've been working on for a while. Easy stitch and easy pattern for an easy time of enoying my Little Mister. I could get used to this change. :)