Monday, January 17, 2011

New Year, Old Me

I did not even try to make up a New Year’s Resolution list this year because, let’s face it, what’s the point of starting out a New Year with a list that will highlight and predict all of your future failures?  Instead, I made (and constantly revise/add/delete) a New Year’s Wish List for this year.  Want to know what’s on my list?  I just knew you did!

1) I wish my taste buds would allow me to enjoy the healthy foods (heck, even the unhealthy ones) that I once enjoyed without telling my brain they taste like a mixture of poo and bile.  I’ve heard of the wondrous and somewhat mythical sounding “pregnancy cravings” and am starting to think they exist in the North Pole with Santa and the Easter Bunny.  Food aversions are really making it difficult to be a “practice what I preach” nutritionist and I’m really hoping my poor little Geekling isn’t going to be born with a pre-disposition for picky eating.  That and ugliness.  I really hope it isn’t ugly.  (What?  Oh come on- you can’t tell me you hoped for an ugly baby!)

2) I wish I wasn’t so dang tired at the end of a normal work day and subsequently fall asleep in odd positions on the couch every evening.  Two hour naps right before bedtime does not allow me to do much else except drool on my couch pillows and groggily drag myself upstairs to finish that weird dream where my coworker was pregnant with sextuplets and was casually giving birth to them, popping them out and leaving them where they landed as she was walking down the side of the road and then walking back up the road to pick them up and dust them off.  (She laughed when I told this to her the next day, but as a mother of 5, she truly thought it was a nightmare….for her.)

3) I wish I did not increase my work hours.  I know this sounds horrible, especially in light of the current economy.  While I am very thankful for my job and for the larger paycheck more hours bring, I truly do miss having my crochet days!  How can I run a blog called “Gege Crochet” if I am not able to crochet anymore??  I’m also feeling my rear end expanding by the hour and I am pretty darn sure that my uterus is NOT next to my gluteus maximus, so it’s not “all baby”.  Granted, if I wasn’t sleeping for 12 hours a day, I’d most likely have the time to both crochet AND exercise like I had planned out in my “pregnancy is going to be a piece of cake because I counsel pregnant women all the time and I know exactly what to do to be healthy and not gain too much weight and bounce right back into shape once the little peanut is finally here” plan.  Ok- this sounds like an addendum to Wish #2 above (and quite possibly also the result of some crazyass pregnancy hormones), so I get another Wish #3.

3) I wish that I was dedicated enough to keep my craft zone as organized as it currently is.  While I am looking forward to the day my energy magically returns, which in turn will release the whirlwind of creative frenzy that has been pent up for the last few months, I’m also extremely fearful of said frenzy and how it will transform my precious wool stash into weapons of mass destruction on my house.  It’s currently sitting there, all innocent and precious, just biding its time when it will leap out of its plastic prison and claim my living room in the name of All Things Sheepy, fighting off my vain attempts to control it with their sharpened crochet hooks that look suspiciously like knitting needles.  *shudder*  I think I just developed my new weird dream for the night….

4) I wish I had fallen asleep when my Mister told me to instead of writing this blog post, even though it made me giggle but now has definitely guaranteed a 3 hour after-work nap tomorrow.

Good night, y’all.

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