Friday, September 19, 2014

When a (Yarn) Bomb is a Complete Dud

I don’t think anything will top the euphoric feeling I had the night my Hookers and I yarnbombed for the first time. It truly was amazing. However, the second time we attacked our town resulted in us putting the “art” in “street art,” if I do say so myself. We were (are) ever so proud of the work we did for our second outing and were really looking forward to all of the excitement and accolades this one would bring (hey- praise is addictive!).  And yet, unfortunately, we were left with a big ol’ “Wah waaaaaaaaaaah!” at the end of it all.

To be honest, that part quite sucked.

You see, after our triumphant Christmas bombing, we put the word out asking for ideas for our next venture. Mr. Mayor actually suggested doing something for Australia Day, which is a lot like our Independence Day….just without the independence. (OOOOOOOOOO BURN!!!!)

We thought that would be an exciting thing to do and, since we were so hopped up on the kudos and accolades and oooohs and aaaaaahs of our first venture, we thought that Australia Day would be a suitable, honorific occasion to showcase our amazing talents.

And then the Aussie members of our group kind of dampened our spirits when they informed us that Australia Day is January 26. Just as a refresher, Christmas is December 25. That meant we had just over a month to pull off another momentous, artistic, magnificent work of amazement.

No worries, mate. We laughed in the face of that small amount of time. Heck. We farted in its general direction. WE ARE THE AMAZING HOOKERS! WE WILL DO IT AND ASTOUND YOU!

So, we started thinking. And thinking. And fretting. And doubting ourselves. And thinking maybe there is something to that whole “pride comes before a fall” thing.

And then....... I got it!!! We should celebrate Australia with something that is uniquely Australian. A dot painting. Correction: a CROCHET dot painting.

I did a lot of measuring and calculating and figuring and then I presented my idea to the gals and they unanimously agreed with it. We just had to get started like RIGHT NOW in order to pull it off, so off we went, again.

Whereas the first time we had a lot of fun getting together and crocheting various pieces together, this time we had an actual goal to attain and a time-frame in which to do it. While we still had fun, the prospect of not meeting our deadline was just a wee bit stressful. And, since I am not the only perfectionist in our little group (ahem, ladies….you know who you are), there was even some talk of perhaps getting it ready for Anzac Day, another momentous Australian holiday…..which is in April.

But, no. The perfectionists (and masochists) in us took over. We soldiered on. We crocheted a hundred million dots. I set them out and rearranged them and sent the gals photos of the final layout. Then I rearranged them again and sent them another picture of THE FINAL layout. Then I rearranged them again. Then they came and put me in a strait jacket and forbade me from touching anymore dots because I was getting just a little bit obsessive ridiculous.

Once the layout was finally, finally finalized, we sewed (by hand!) all those dots on the background. We then cursed sewing anything by hand and vowed to never do it again.

And then, just under 6 weeks after we agreed to develop carpal tunnel amaze our town once more, we were done.

EXCEPT. One small detail.

You see, the first time around we were pretty darn smart about it. We chose a location and then crocheted things to fit our target. It was a pretty good plan, actually. Pick something. Measure it. Crochet things that fit that measurement so that it would be easy to put it all together in a short amount of time so that we could then book it to our getaway car.

This time around, we were more “prideful” than we were “smart.” We chose an amazing project, but unfortunately had no location in which to display our project. So we brainstormed. And thought. And argued. And thought some more. You see, due to the nature of our “yarn bombing,” we wanted a more secure location for it. A place where it would be protected from the elements….and from those nasty, no-good, crochet-stealing thieves out there. I hear they run rampant here in the Outback. Just looking for some yarny goodness to swipe to give to their dingo-eating babies. (Wait a second…..)

We finally requested permission from one of the local malls to use one of their empty storefronts as a display for our Pièce de résistance. They acquiesced and we “sneakily” set up our “yarnbombing” around 9am when the stores opened, right before Australia day.

And then we waited.

We waited for the accolades to come in. Waited for the word to spread on social media. Waited for our GENIUS to be discovered and appreciated and shouted about from the rooftops.

And we waited.


I basically ended up tweeting out there, “Hey….did anybody see our wonderful piece of art/yarnbombing? Because it truly is amazing and you should be stroking our egos right about now” only to be told that people looked and couldn’t find it.

I finally know what, “taking the wind out of the sails,” looks like in a group of women. It is not pretty.

Turns out that, though our work was protected from the elements and from dingo-eating thieves, it was also protected from EVERYTHING. Including people’s eyes. The one thing we were hoping to attract. We may have flattered ourselves in thinking that, perhaps, it may have looked like an official Australia Day decoration in the mall store front, so nobody really took notice, but, well….the fact remains that our yarnbombing was much more of a dud.



This time we learned from our mistake and have chosen a location first, and then a project second…..

And it is coming……. 

Photo courtesy of the amazingly awesome Sarena Kelley

There are a total of 705 crochet dots in 25 different colours crocheted by seven different women and hand sewn onto this gigantic Australia, which is set adrift upon a blue crochet ripple ocean. 

PS: I crocheted the ripple background. It's about 7' square.  THIS IS FREAKIN' HUGE. And, regardless of the accolades (or lack thereof) we received, IT IS AWESOME.


  1. In our defense....we ended up putting up some awesome stuff out pointing to our work (since nobody noticed at first). EVERYTHING we put up was taken. Except for our afghan safely ensconced in glass. NASTY NO GOOD CROCHET STEALING DINGO EATING THIEVES!

  2. PS: This was Miss Regina's comment to which I was replying above (there were issues with comments here, so she left it for me on FB):

    My comment wouldn't show up on your blog (nice try). So you put your pretty afghan in a shop and no one noticed? Tsk, tsk,
    and this was a GROUP decision? After how many boxes of wine available only after 5 p.m.?
    Maybe, Dear, if you had SMASHED the window, glued chain stitch along the sharp edges so no one would get hurt, THEN put it in the window? No one put Baby in a corner and no one puts graffiti under glass.

  3. It truly is fab and you so deserve true praise indeed.... so I am shouting from the roof top right now. My last yarn bomb (which is actually hugely embarassing compared to yours!!!) was taken down by said crochet thieves in under 24hrs... that took the wind out of my sails too :( but onwards and upwards always right?

  4. Aw thanks, ayarnyrobin! Those dang thieves.....ARGH!!! One of my girls and I crocheted two long scarves- one said, "Aussie Aussie Aussie!" the other, "Oi, Oi, Oi!" on it to put on the outside of the window and hopefully draw attention to it. The next morning...GONE! It was truly heartbreaking since we never got any pictures of them. :-\

  5. So good to see you blogging again. I have always enjoyed reading it and being inspired. It has been 8 months since my father passed and I find myself in the throes of depression. I don't believe in medication and know God will see me through this. I have lost my passion to crochet but am trying to get it back. Just knowing you are back at it again encourages me. Thanks for sharing. It really is helping! Sally

    1. Thank you, Anon, for your kind words. I am so sorry to hear about your father. I am glad that you have found encouragement here and I hope your crochet sabbatical, as it were, will come to an end, soon. May the Lord continue to guide and protect you through this dark time. xoxo