The movers are here. (!!!) THE MOVERS ARE HERE!!
Did I set aside enough yarn and clothes and yarn and toys and yarn to last us at least 2-3 months? I think I need to take some more yarn before they pack it all away.
DON’T TAKE MY YARN FROM ME! *SNARL SPIT HISS*
Will the kids transition easily? Of course they will, what am I thinking? They will think they just got the mother load of Christmas presents when they open up all the boxes with their toys on the other side. Kids are dumb.
Were we organized enough this time around to avoid all the snarling, hissing, and spitting that occurred last time? ORGANIZED??? HA! Just who’s blog do you think you are reading? Although, My Mister is super organized. That’s good. He’s probably thought of things that I didn’t think of. He’s amazing like that. I like him. I hope he likes me, too. DON’T LEAVE ME! I’ve got yarn! Though, that may not be as enticing for him as it is for me…. Hmmmm…. I’VE GOT YARN!!!!!
Yep, that should do it.
The movers just took a look at my vacuum packed stash and asked who the knitter is and then said, “I bet it’s not him!” WHAT? Just how racist can you be??? I AM A CROCHETER, NOT A KNITTER! I mean, yes I can knit now, BUT STILL!
It’s ok, Gege. It’s ok. Just hold on for a couple more days until they are all done with the packing and it will be ok. Remember your mantra! “I am a woman, not just a mindless eating machine. Fish are friends, BUT YARN IS BETTER!”
Better pack some more yarn….
Showing posts with label Australia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Australia. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 8, 2014
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Erin's Hug: Free Pattern
I love Australia. I truly do. It’s so much more than gigantic (and sometimes miniscule) things that can kill you with their brains (and teeth and poison). And, it’s so much larger than people realize- just about the same size as the contiguous United States. (So, for those of you who told me that such and such was going to be on tour in Australia so I should just pop on over to see it….it’s like saying, “Hey! You should drive to New York from Albuquerque this weekend so you can see Les Miserables!”)
In other words, it ain’t gonna happen. And study some geography, yo.
It’s also farther away than many people realize. It’s quite literally on the other side of the world from the US and, regardless of what that amazingly awesome and annoying Disney ride tells you, it is NOT a small world after all. It took us 36 hours of travel time to get to our home in Australia from the east coast of the States. 36 hours. With a two month old newborn and a new mother who was trying desperately to hold on to her sanity while not ripping off everybody’s head because they had slept in the past 2 months and she HAD NOT SLEPT AND I’M GOING TO DIE.
*HEAVY HYPERVENTILATION*
Ok. I’m better now. Just a little PTSD. No big whoop.
When we first moved here, I started crocheting like a mad woman. Well…a slightly deranged woman. I bought yarn like a mad woman. You can never have enough yarn…it makes for a great insulator for the padded room.
One of the first things I made was this gorgeous purple scarf.
It’s basically the South Bay Shawlette hacked into a scarf. A very long and wide, lacy scarf of awesomeness.
And then I made it in a bright, vivacious red lace because I loved it- I especially loved the repetitive nature of the stitches. It was nice to have something simple to work on when the rest of my life was full of hecticness.
It’s the whole, “on the other side of the world” thing that has been the toughest for us. Little Mister was the first grandchild on both sides of our families and has met his grandparents 3 times. I’m so thankful we were able to go back when he was 9 months old because that was the first, and only, time my dad got to meet him. He passed 4 months later. When you’re faced with the mortality of your loved ones, especially your parents, the other side of the world is NOT where you want to be.
We were not there for other major trials, tribulations and joys, either. Major surgeries and hospitalizations, more deaths (my grandmother passed a week or two after SweetPea was born), as well as life (our sweet niece, who just turned two and who we have only met once).
I was able to spend some time with friends and family in Arizona and New Mexico a couple times, which was great. Though, I missed my other friends and family on the east coast terribly and can’t believe it’s been 3 years since we last saw each other. My dear BFF Lyteyz tried to visit me in NM while I was there for my dad’s funeral but things were just too hectic.
She so wished she could be there for me- a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, a hug to let me know I wasn’t alone. She was faced with her own stressors during this time. She and her family were trying to come to terms with the fact that her own father was going to leave them soon. Stage 4 melanoma is nobody’s friend.
I am so thankful for my other BFF Ronda during this time- she let me and Little Mister crash at her place for the 3 (4?) weeks we were there and even helped Lyteyz send her “hug” to me via a beautiful bouquet of flowers sent to Ronda’s house as a surprise.
It was sometime around here that I started working on my third lacy scarf. Ever since I first made the purple one, I had wanted it in this amazing, bright blue and had the perfect yarn for it in my ever expanding stash.
I started working on it and it made me happy. I couldn’t wait to wear it, especially since I wore my red one with everything. As I was working on it, I kept thinking of Lyteyz. Every single time I picked it up, her face would pop up into my mind. It was a little creepy, actually. GET OUT OF MY HEAD, LYTEYZ! I can’t hear the other voices!
And then, March rolled around and my beautiful SweetPea was born. And then my grandmother passed. And then April rolled around and I so wished I could have been there for Lyteyz when she let me know the day the Lord finally called her dad home.
And then I knew. I knew why this scarf had Lyteyz written all over it. It was big and beautiful and yet light and airy. Something you can wrap yourself up in and yet not be overwhelmed with. It was a perfect hug.
Since I couldn’t be there for her during her very difficult time, I knew that this scarf was destined to give her the hug that I couldn’t give in person.
So, I’m sharing it here with you. Maybe you need a hug or know someone who needs a hug. Maybe you have a gigantic stash that you need to work through and your husband needs a hug as he weeps for joy that it’s slowly but surely going down.
It’s a super simple pattern- more of a recipe, really. I didn’t add an edging to it since it’s so very lacy and I wanted it simple. (That and lace weight yarn is so flippin’ tiny. Any therapeutic value this project had would have been for naught if I tried to single crochet all the way around it. I’m getting anxiety now just thinking about it.)
Without further ado, here’s Erin’s Hug, from me to you.
Erin's Hug
What you need:
880 yards lace weight yarn
4.5mm crochet hook
Note:
Special stitches:
Small-V:
Large-V: (dc, ch3, dc) in indicated stitch
What you do:
Worked in a multiple of 8+10
Chain 82
Row 1: Sc in second ch from hook and on down. (81sc) (Conversely, you can do 81fsc if you so wish and follow from there)
Row 2: Ch3, dc next sc. Ch1, skip 2 sc, Large-V in next sc. *Ch1, skip 2 sc, dc in next 3 sc. Ch1, skip 2 sc, Large-V in next sc. Repeat from * until last 2 sc. Ch1, Dc in last 2 sc. Turn
Row 3: Ch4, skip next (dc, ch1), 7dc in ch3 sp. *Ch1, skip next (ch1, dc), dc in next dc (middle dc of 3-dc group). Ch 1, skip next (dc, ch1), 7dc in ch3 sp. Repeat from * until last 2dc. Ch1, dc in top of ch3. Turn
Row 4: Small-V in first dc. Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2 dc), dc in next 3 dc. *Ch1, skip next (2 dc, ch1), Large-V in next dc. Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2 dc), dc in next 3 dc. Repeat from* to last dc. Ch1, Small-V in 3rd ch of ch4. Turn
Row 5: Ch3, 3dc in ch1 sp. Ch1, skip next (ch1, dc), dc in next dc (middle dc of 3-dc group). *Ch 1, skip next (dc, ch1), 7dc in ch3 sp. Ch1, skip next (ch1, dc), dc in next dc. Repeat from * until last Small V. ch1, 3 dc in ch1sp, dc in last dc.
Row 6: Ch3, dc next dc. Ch1, skip next (2 dc, ch1), Large-V in next dc. *Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2 dc), dc in next 3 dc. Ch1, skip next (2 dc, ch1), Large-V in next dc. Repeat from * until last 4 dc. Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2dc), dc in last 2 dc. Turn.
Repeat rows 3-6, ending on a row 6, until you are just about out of yarn.
Last row: Ch1, sc in first 2 dc, *sc in ch1 space, sc next dc, 1sc in ch3 sp, sc next dc, sc in ch1 space, sc in next 3 dc. Repeat from * on down. (81sc)
(If you end on a row 4, make sure to sc in every dc and ch1 spaces, and ONLY 1sc in the ch3 spaces.)
Bind off and weave in ends. Give yourself a hug.
Copyright 2014 Gege Crochet. All rights reserved. Pattern available for personal use only- please don't sell it- that's just not cool. You can sell, FO, though. Hug as many people as you like. Just please don't post this pattern anywhere- you can provide a link back to here, though.
In other words, it ain’t gonna happen. And study some geography, yo.
It’s also farther away than many people realize. It’s quite literally on the other side of the world from the US and, regardless of what that amazingly awesome and annoying Disney ride tells you, it is NOT a small world after all. It took us 36 hours of travel time to get to our home in Australia from the east coast of the States. 36 hours. With a two month old newborn and a new mother who was trying desperately to hold on to her sanity while not ripping off everybody’s head because they had slept in the past 2 months and she HAD NOT SLEPT AND I’M GOING TO DIE.
*HEAVY HYPERVENTILATION*
Ok. I’m better now. Just a little PTSD. No big whoop.
When we first moved here, I started crocheting like a mad woman. Well…a slightly deranged woman. I bought yarn like a mad woman. You can never have enough yarn…it makes for a great insulator for the padded room.
One of the first things I made was this gorgeous purple scarf.
 | |
| LOVE LOVE LOVE PURPLE. And this scarf, too. |
 |
| I may or may not have twirled around and pranced like a ballerina with it. I'll never tell. |
It’s basically the South Bay Shawlette hacked into a scarf. A very long and wide, lacy scarf of awesomeness.
And then I made it in a bright, vivacious red lace because I loved it- I especially loved the repetitive nature of the stitches. It was nice to have something simple to work on when the rest of my life was full of hecticness.
 |
| VIVACIOUS. The scarf ain't bad, either. Hee! |
It’s the whole, “on the other side of the world” thing that has been the toughest for us. Little Mister was the first grandchild on both sides of our families and has met his grandparents 3 times. I’m so thankful we were able to go back when he was 9 months old because that was the first, and only, time my dad got to meet him. He passed 4 months later. When you’re faced with the mortality of your loved ones, especially your parents, the other side of the world is NOT where you want to be.
We were not there for other major trials, tribulations and joys, either. Major surgeries and hospitalizations, more deaths (my grandmother passed a week or two after SweetPea was born), as well as life (our sweet niece, who just turned two and who we have only met once).
I was able to spend some time with friends and family in Arizona and New Mexico a couple times, which was great. Though, I missed my other friends and family on the east coast terribly and can’t believe it’s been 3 years since we last saw each other. My dear BFF Lyteyz tried to visit me in NM while I was there for my dad’s funeral but things were just too hectic.
She so wished she could be there for me- a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, a hug to let me know I wasn’t alone. She was faced with her own stressors during this time. She and her family were trying to come to terms with the fact that her own father was going to leave them soon. Stage 4 melanoma is nobody’s friend.
I am so thankful for my other BFF Ronda during this time- she let me and Little Mister crash at her place for the 3 (4?) weeks we were there and even helped Lyteyz send her “hug” to me via a beautiful bouquet of flowers sent to Ronda’s house as a surprise.
It was sometime around here that I started working on my third lacy scarf. Ever since I first made the purple one, I had wanted it in this amazing, bright blue and had the perfect yarn for it in my ever expanding stash.
 |
| This is pre-blocking...blocking is A MUST with this shawl. |
I started working on it and it made me happy. I couldn’t wait to wear it, especially since I wore my red one with everything. As I was working on it, I kept thinking of Lyteyz. Every single time I picked it up, her face would pop up into my mind. It was a little creepy, actually. GET OUT OF MY HEAD, LYTEYZ! I can’t hear the other voices!
And then, March rolled around and my beautiful SweetPea was born. And then my grandmother passed. And then April rolled around and I so wished I could have been there for Lyteyz when she let me know the day the Lord finally called her dad home.
And then I knew. I knew why this scarf had Lyteyz written all over it. It was big and beautiful and yet light and airy. Something you can wrap yourself up in and yet not be overwhelmed with. It was a perfect hug.
Since I couldn’t be there for her during her very difficult time, I knew that this scarf was destined to give her the hug that I couldn’t give in person.
So, I’m sharing it here with you. Maybe you need a hug or know someone who needs a hug. Maybe you have a gigantic stash that you need to work through and your husband needs a hug as he weeps for joy that it’s slowly but surely going down.
It’s a super simple pattern- more of a recipe, really. I didn’t add an edging to it since it’s so very lacy and I wanted it simple. (That and lace weight yarn is so flippin’ tiny. Any therapeutic value this project had would have been for naught if I tried to single crochet all the way around it. I’m getting anxiety now just thinking about it.)
Without further ado, here’s Erin’s Hug, from me to you.
 |
| My beautiful BFF, Lyteyz. Bet you can't guess how she got that handle. |
Erin's Hug
What you need:
880 yards lace weight yarn
- (I used 2 skeins of KnitPicks Gloss for the red one and 2 skeins of KnitPicks Shadow Tonal (unfortunately discontinued (!!!) ) for the blue one. KnitPicks, and their sales, may or may not be part of the reason my closets are filled to the brim with yarn. And why My Mister weeps
for joy. The purple one is a mystery wool from a cone gifted to me when I first moved to Australia. I love Aussies. They give me yarn.)
4.5mm crochet hook
- (It’s labeled as a G hook, but I have 3 different G hooks- 4mm, 4.25mm, and 4.5mm. Just use whichever one you have.)
Note:
- Ch4 counts as dc, ch1
- Ch3 counts as dc
- I cannot stress enough how important blocking is to this project. Once you are done crocheting it, it will look like an ugly pile of poo. But, once you block it, BAM! The lace comes out and you will be amazed at how much it grows, both horizontally and vertically. Blocking: it’s a good thing.
- After blocking, this was about 18" x 80". KnitPicks lace yarns are a heavier lace weight, so the red and blue ones ended up slightly larger than the purple one, which was a much finer lace weight. If you are using a finer lace weight and desire a really wide stole/scarf, add another repeat (8 stitches).
Special stitches:
Small-V:
- At beginning of row: (ch4, dc) in first dc
- At end of row: (dc, ch1, dc) in last dc
Large-V: (dc, ch3, dc) in indicated stitch
What you do:
Worked in a multiple of 8+10
Chain 82
Row 1: Sc in second ch from hook and on down. (81sc) (Conversely, you can do 81fsc if you so wish and follow from there)
Row 2: Ch3, dc next sc. Ch1, skip 2 sc, Large-V in next sc. *Ch1, skip 2 sc, dc in next 3 sc. Ch1, skip 2 sc, Large-V in next sc. Repeat from * until last 2 sc. Ch1, Dc in last 2 sc. Turn
Row 3: Ch4, skip next (dc, ch1), 7dc in ch3 sp. *Ch1, skip next (ch1, dc), dc in next dc (middle dc of 3-dc group). Ch 1, skip next (dc, ch1), 7dc in ch3 sp. Repeat from * until last 2dc. Ch1, dc in top of ch3. Turn
Row 4: Small-V in first dc. Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2 dc), dc in next 3 dc. *Ch1, skip next (2 dc, ch1), Large-V in next dc. Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2 dc), dc in next 3 dc. Repeat from* to last dc. Ch1, Small-V in 3rd ch of ch4. Turn
Row 5: Ch3, 3dc in ch1 sp. Ch1, skip next (ch1, dc), dc in next dc (middle dc of 3-dc group). *Ch 1, skip next (dc, ch1), 7dc in ch3 sp. Ch1, skip next (ch1, dc), dc in next dc. Repeat from * until last Small V. ch1, 3 dc in ch1sp, dc in last dc.
Row 6: Ch3, dc next dc. Ch1, skip next (2 dc, ch1), Large-V in next dc. *Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2 dc), dc in next 3 dc. Ch1, skip next (2 dc, ch1), Large-V in next dc. Repeat from * until last 4 dc. Ch1, skip next (ch1, 2dc), dc in last 2 dc. Turn.
Repeat rows 3-6, ending on a row 6, until you are just about out of yarn.
Last row: Ch1, sc in first 2 dc, *sc in ch1 space, sc next dc, 1sc in ch3 sp, sc next dc, sc in ch1 space, sc in next 3 dc. Repeat from * on down. (81sc)
(If you end on a row 4, make sure to sc in every dc and ch1 spaces, and ONLY 1sc in the ch3 spaces.)
Bind off and weave in ends. Give yourself a hug.
Copyright 2014 Gege Crochet. All rights reserved. Pattern available for personal use only- please don't sell it- that's just not cool. You can sell, FO, though. Hug as many people as you like. Just please don't post this pattern anywhere- you can provide a link back to here, though.
Friday, September 19, 2014
When a (Yarn) Bomb is a Complete Dud
I don’t think anything will top the euphoric feeling I had the night my Hookers and I yarnbombed for the first time. It truly was amazing. However, the second time we attacked our town resulted in us putting the “art” in “street art,” if I do say so myself. We were (are) ever so proud of the work we did for our second outing and were really looking forward to all of the excitement and accolades this one would bring (hey- praise is addictive!). And yet, unfortunately, we were left with a big ol’ “Wah waaaaaaaaaaah!” at the end of it all.
To be honest, that part quite sucked.
You see, after our triumphant Christmas bombing, we put the word out asking for ideas for our next venture. Mr. Mayor actually suggested doing something for Australia Day, which is a lot like our Independence Day….just without the independence. (OOOOOOOOOO BURN!!!!)
We thought that would be an exciting thing to do and, since we were so hopped up on the kudos and accolades and oooohs and aaaaaahs of our first venture, we thought that Australia Day would be a suitable, honorific occasion to showcase our amazing talents.
And then the Aussie members of our group kind of dampened our spirits when they informed us that Australia Day is January 26. Just as a refresher, Christmas is December 25. That meant we had just over a month to pull off another momentous, artistic, magnificent work of amazement.
No worries, mate. We laughed in the face of that small amount of time. Heck. We farted in its general direction. WE ARE THE AMAZING HOOKERS! WE WILL DO IT AND ASTOUND YOU!
So, we started thinking. And thinking. And fretting. And doubting ourselves. And thinking maybe there is something to that whole “pride comes before a fall” thing.
And then....... I got it!!! We should celebrate Australia with something that is uniquely Australian. A dot painting. Correction: a CROCHET dot painting.
I did a lot of measuring and calculating and figuring and then I presented my idea to the gals and they unanimously agreed with it. We just had to get started like RIGHT NOW in order to pull it off, so off we went, again.
Whereas the first time we had a lot of fun getting together and crocheting various pieces together, this time we had an actual goal to attain and a time-frame in which to do it. While we still had fun, the prospect of not meeting our deadline was just a wee bit stressful. And, since I am not the only perfectionist in our little group (ahem, ladies….you know who you are), there was even some talk of perhaps getting it ready for Anzac Day, another momentous Australian holiday…..which is in April.
But, no. The perfectionists (and masochists) in us took over. We soldiered on. We crocheted a hundred million dots. I set them out and rearranged them and sent the gals photos of the final layout. Then I rearranged them again and sent them another picture of THE FINAL layout. Then I rearranged them again. Then they came and put me in a strait jacket and forbade me from touching anymore dots because I was getting just a little bitobsessive ridiculous.
Once the layout was finally, finally finalized, we sewed (by hand!) all those dots on the background. We then cursed sewing anything by hand and vowed to never do it again.
And then, just under 6 weeks after we agreed todevelop carpal tunnel amaze our town once more, we were done.
EXCEPT. One small detail.
You see, the first time around we were pretty darn smart about it. We chose a location and then crocheted things to fit our target. It was a pretty good plan, actually. Pick something. Measure it. Crochet things that fit that measurement so that it would be easy to put it all together in a short amount of time so that we could then book it to our getaway car.
This time around, we were more “prideful” than we were “smart.” We chose an amazing project, but unfortunately had no location in which to display our project. So we brainstormed. And thought. And argued. And thought some more. You see, due to the nature of our “yarn bombing,” we wanted a more secure location for it. A place where it would be protected from the elements….and from those nasty, no-good, crochet-stealing thieves out there. I hear they run rampant here in the Outback. Just looking for some yarny goodness to swipe to give to their dingo-eating babies. (Wait a second…..)
We finally requested permission from one of the local malls to use one of their empty storefronts as a display for our Pièce de résistance. They acquiesced and we “sneakily” set up our “yarnbombing” around 9am when the stores opened, right before Australia day.
And then we waited.
We waited for the accolades to come in. Waited for the word to spread on social media. Waited for our GENIUS to be discovered and appreciated and shouted about from the rooftops.
And we waited.
AND NOTHING.
I basically ended up tweeting out there, “Hey….did anybody see our wonderful piece of art/yarnbombing? Because it truly is amazing and you should be stroking our egos right about now” only to be told that people looked and couldn’t find it.
I finally know what, “taking the wind out of the sails,” looks like in a group of women. It is not pretty.
Turns out that, though our work was protected from the elements and from dingo-eating thieves, it was also protected from EVERYTHING. Including people’s eyes. The one thing we were hoping to attract. We may have flattered ourselves in thinking that, perhaps, it may have looked like an official Australia Day decoration in the mall store front, so nobody really took notice, but, well….the fact remains that our yarnbombing was much more of a dud.
*HUGH SIGH*
SO.
This time we learned from our mistake and have chosen a location first, and then a project second…..
And it is coming…….
There are a total of 705 crochet dots in 25 different colours crocheted by seven different women and hand sewn onto this gigantic Australia, which is set adrift upon a blue crochet ripple ocean.
PS: I crocheted the ripple background. It's about 7' square. THIS IS FREAKIN' HUGE. And, regardless of the accolades (or lack thereof) we received, IT IS AWESOME.
To be honest, that part quite sucked.
You see, after our triumphant Christmas bombing, we put the word out asking for ideas for our next venture. Mr. Mayor actually suggested doing something for Australia Day, which is a lot like our Independence Day….just without the independence. (OOOOOOOOOO BURN!!!!)
We thought that would be an exciting thing to do and, since we were so hopped up on the kudos and accolades and oooohs and aaaaaahs of our first venture, we thought that Australia Day would be a suitable, honorific occasion to showcase our amazing talents.
And then the Aussie members of our group kind of dampened our spirits when they informed us that Australia Day is January 26. Just as a refresher, Christmas is December 25. That meant we had just over a month to pull off another momentous, artistic, magnificent work of amazement.
No worries, mate. We laughed in the face of that small amount of time. Heck. We farted in its general direction. WE ARE THE AMAZING HOOKERS! WE WILL DO IT AND ASTOUND YOU!
So, we started thinking. And thinking. And fretting. And doubting ourselves. And thinking maybe there is something to that whole “pride comes before a fall” thing.
And then....... I got it!!! We should celebrate Australia with something that is uniquely Australian. A dot painting. Correction: a CROCHET dot painting.
I did a lot of measuring and calculating and figuring and then I presented my idea to the gals and they unanimously agreed with it. We just had to get started like RIGHT NOW in order to pull it off, so off we went, again.
Whereas the first time we had a lot of fun getting together and crocheting various pieces together, this time we had an actual goal to attain and a time-frame in which to do it. While we still had fun, the prospect of not meeting our deadline was just a wee bit stressful. And, since I am not the only perfectionist in our little group (ahem, ladies….you know who you are), there was even some talk of perhaps getting it ready for Anzac Day, another momentous Australian holiday…..which is in April.
But, no. The perfectionists (and masochists) in us took over. We soldiered on. We crocheted a hundred million dots. I set them out and rearranged them and sent the gals photos of the final layout. Then I rearranged them again and sent them another picture of THE FINAL layout. Then I rearranged them again. Then they came and put me in a strait jacket and forbade me from touching anymore dots because I was getting just a little bit
Once the layout was finally, finally finalized, we sewed (by hand!) all those dots on the background. We then cursed sewing anything by hand and vowed to never do it again.
And then, just under 6 weeks after we agreed to
EXCEPT. One small detail.
You see, the first time around we were pretty darn smart about it. We chose a location and then crocheted things to fit our target. It was a pretty good plan, actually. Pick something. Measure it. Crochet things that fit that measurement so that it would be easy to put it all together in a short amount of time so that we could then book it to our getaway car.
This time around, we were more “prideful” than we were “smart.” We chose an amazing project, but unfortunately had no location in which to display our project. So we brainstormed. And thought. And argued. And thought some more. You see, due to the nature of our “yarn bombing,” we wanted a more secure location for it. A place where it would be protected from the elements….and from those nasty, no-good, crochet-stealing thieves out there. I hear they run rampant here in the Outback. Just looking for some yarny goodness to swipe to give to their dingo-eating babies. (Wait a second…..)
We finally requested permission from one of the local malls to use one of their empty storefronts as a display for our Pièce de résistance. They acquiesced and we “sneakily” set up our “yarnbombing” around 9am when the stores opened, right before Australia day.
And then we waited.
We waited for the accolades to come in. Waited for the word to spread on social media. Waited for our GENIUS to be discovered and appreciated and shouted about from the rooftops.
And we waited.
AND NOTHING.
I basically ended up tweeting out there, “Hey….did anybody see our wonderful piece of art/yarnbombing? Because it truly is amazing and you should be stroking our egos right about now” only to be told that people looked and couldn’t find it.
I finally know what, “taking the wind out of the sails,” looks like in a group of women. It is not pretty.
Turns out that, though our work was protected from the elements and from dingo-eating thieves, it was also protected from EVERYTHING. Including people’s eyes. The one thing we were hoping to attract. We may have flattered ourselves in thinking that, perhaps, it may have looked like an official Australia Day decoration in the mall store front, so nobody really took notice, but, well….the fact remains that our yarnbombing was much more of a dud.
*HUGH SIGH*
SO.
This time we learned from our mistake and have chosen a location first, and then a project second…..
And it is coming…….
 |
| Photo courtesy of the amazingly awesome Sarena Kelley |
There are a total of 705 crochet dots in 25 different colours crocheted by seven different women and hand sewn onto this gigantic Australia, which is set adrift upon a blue crochet ripple ocean.
PS: I crocheted the ripple background. It's about 7' square. THIS IS FREAKIN' HUGE. And, regardless of the accolades (or lack thereof) we received, IT IS AWESOME.
Thursday, September 18, 2014
My name is Gege, and I am a Hooker
Why, hello again! I know- I can’t believe it, either. Two posts in two consecutive days?? Craziness!
Well, like I said yesterday, I truly have been doing a whole lot better as of late and, as I mentioned before, my new crochet group, and specifically this event recorded here, has so much to do with it.*
You see, my crochet group isn’t just any ordinary crochet group. Yes, we crochet. Yes, we eat. Yes, we laugh and eat have a good time and eat. BUT! We are SO MUCH MORE!
You see, as of this moment, we have existed only in the whispers and the shadows of our little town. In the dark recesses and bowels of my living room have we conspired and devised to create such bright and beautiful stuff out of a whole lot of fluffy, yummy yarn. But still….dark….shadows…….mystery….oooooEEEEEoooooo!
It all started sometime last year- maybe around August or so. A lady had offered to donate her yarn stash that she was no longer going to use. (She was going to focus on other artistic endeavors and not her knitting or crochet anymore. I think, due to her obvious insanity, she is now in treatment at the local asylum.) I, being the yarn hog that I am, jumped at the opportunity to get my hands on more (FREE!) yarn. Her only request was that, whoever received it must make something with it to donate for the greater good of our town.
Well. The truth of the matter was that I not only intended to do something for the greater good for our town, but I also had no intention of keeping her stash for myself. (!!!)
I’ll wait until you’ve picked your jaw up off the floor and have composed yourself again….
Ahem.
You see, I have wanted, nay- DREAMED, of doing something a little bit crazy with my own yarn stash, but truly was having separation anxiety and panic attacks just thinking of letting even a little bit out of their air-tight containers because IT’S MINE! ALL MINE, I TELL YOU!!!
So, when this very generous lady offered up her stash, I knew exactly what I wanted to do with it.
I wanted to yarn bomb.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with yarn bombing, it’s basically graffiti made with yarn. It’s a way of creating street art without destroying property. It also takes a lot of covert planning, a lot of time, and a LOT of yarn.
Thankfully, this lady’s “couple of bags of yarn” turned out to be a whole living room-full of yarn.
I put the word out to fellow crocheters who may be interested and was pleasantly surprised that there were quite a few who wanted to join me in my nefarious yarn dealings. So, we got together and started scouting various spots in town to find just the right spot. I’m sure we looked oh so nonchalant with our measuring tapes and cameras as we continually looked over our shoulders to see if anyone was alerting the police.
Then we started planning, and stitching, and sewing, and getting more and more excited. We planned on attacking our target right before Christmas, so most of the things we made had something to do with Christmas- colors, snowflakes (because Australia is known for having a white Christmas), Santa Claus, mad dashes to the mall to be trampled while trying to get your hands on that one special “IT TOY” of the season, etc.
When we had everything stitched up and assembled, we then had to plan our attack carefully. You see, we didn’t know whether or not we’d get in trouble for this if we were to get caught. It is, after all, graffiti. Yes, it’s graffiti that can be easily removed without damaging any public property, but still, we were frightened out of our minds. This, of course, made it that much more exciting and interesting and, well, FUN. So, I, being the mastermind behind it all, decided to buy the four of us who volunteered to….display our work….some masks and hats so that if they checked the CCTV, our beautiful mugs wouldn’t be recognizable.
(Although, I did put on a full face of makeup just in case we were arrested. I wanted to ensure I looked really dang good for my first mugshot.)
Then we snuck out of our houses under the cover of darkness, and without any support from our spouses. None of our husbands wanted to have anything to do with it- they didn’t want to be accessories to the crime nor be caught as the getaway drivers. Wussies. (Though one of them did offer to alert the others if we needed bail. How thoughtful!)
We parked as far away as we felt we safely could- far away enough to not link our (my) car with the “crime,” yet close enough that, if we had to outrun the PoPo, we had a fighting chance to reach it in time. (In reality, we just had to outrun our pregnant partner in crime. I’m sure they would have taken it easy on her.) And then, we were off. Four women in shiny masks and Christmas hats, carrying bags filled with obviously nefarious goods, trying to be all sneaky by dodging behind walls and humming the Bond theme song….oh yeah. We had this “criminal” thing down.
We got to our destination and quickly started our attack. We came armed with plastic zip ties so we wouldn’t have to waste time sewing, crocheting or stapling our works together (though we did have to sew just a bit....see that fearless masked woman below. She's amazing). We worked furiously fast so we could escape (hopefully) without notice and we had a strict, “NO EYE CONTACT!” policy just in case anyone happened to walk by us.
Our hearts were in our throats and then we nearly died when we saw a security car with two big, burly Aussie men pull up beside us. I’m not sure if it was the sight of us in our disguises or the fact that we had hooks and scissors and probably were just crazy enough to JACK THEM UP! But they smiled, waved and drove off.
Yeah. That’s right, big guys. DON’T BE MESSING WITH THE YARNIES!
And then, before we knew it, we were done.
We were so freaking exhilarated and high on adrenaline and proud that we scared off the security henchmen that we were literally skipping back to our getaway vehicle.
It truly, with no exaggeration, was the BEST NIGHT EVER! I had not had so much fun in ages! It was that night specifically that signaled to me that I was, honest and for reals, finally whole again. It was everything- the planning and coordinating of the project, the conspiracy with other like-minded people, the insane thrills of wondering if we would get arrested and, if we did, the absurdity of telling people why we got arrested….and the only thing that made it better was the aftermath.
You see, our little town tends to be a quiet little town with not too much excitement going on- especially during the summer months when it’s hotter than hades out here and most people migrate to cooler locations during this time- places like the Sahara or Death Valley. So, the next morning when people started going to work and came across our little Christmas decoration, news spread quickly. As a matter of fact, it was THE news for the next couple of days where even the local ABC radio station spent the morning trying to figure out who the heck was responsible for it. They had people calling in from all over Australia (for reals!) saying that they knew someone artsy/fartsy enough to be responsible for it. IT WAS AWESOME! We decided to create a twitter handle so we could live tweet the show and start answering some questions and let them know who we were….without letting them know who we were.
IT WAS SO MUCH FUN!
Our project brought some wonderful Christmas cheer to our little town and even the mayor was excited about it and wondered who these “Hookers” were. Once we knew we had an ally in the mayor, we knew we didn’t have to fear imprisonment the next time we decided to strike. (And there was a next time…..)
It was due to all the secrecy that I had not blogged about this before- I so wanted to yell it from the rooftops, but the secrecy was a big part of the fun!**
So, there you have it. A true, dark and mysterious tale filled with yarny goodness that resulted in Christmas cheer, and thankfully no arrests. And so, yes, Mr. Mayor. Alice1 has finally been unmasked. We have another hit planned shortly.....you have been warned.....
*The other part was that I sought treatment for my PPD and have, thankfully, come out the other side. I truly am, finally, MO BETTAH than I’ve been in years.
**I’ll let you know why I’m breaking my silence, while still keeping my co-conspirators anonymity, shortly…..
Well, like I said yesterday, I truly have been doing a whole lot better as of late and, as I mentioned before, my new crochet group, and specifically this event recorded here, has so much to do with it.*
You see, my crochet group isn’t just any ordinary crochet group. Yes, we crochet. Yes, we eat. Yes, we laugh and eat have a good time and eat. BUT! We are SO MUCH MORE!
You see, as of this moment, we have existed only in the whispers and the shadows of our little town. In the dark recesses and bowels of my living room have we conspired and devised to create such bright and beautiful stuff out of a whole lot of fluffy, yummy yarn. But still….dark….shadows…….mystery….oooooEEEEEoooooo!
It all started sometime last year- maybe around August or so. A lady had offered to donate her yarn stash that she was no longer going to use. (She was going to focus on other artistic endeavors and not her knitting or crochet anymore. I think, due to her obvious insanity, she is now in treatment at the local asylum.) I, being the yarn hog that I am, jumped at the opportunity to get my hands on more (FREE!) yarn. Her only request was that, whoever received it must make something with it to donate for the greater good of our town.
Well. The truth of the matter was that I not only intended to do something for the greater good for our town, but I also had no intention of keeping her stash for myself. (!!!)
I’ll wait until you’ve picked your jaw up off the floor and have composed yourself again….
Ahem.
You see, I have wanted, nay- DREAMED, of doing something a little bit crazy with my own yarn stash, but truly was having separation anxiety and panic attacks just thinking of letting even a little bit out of their air-tight containers because IT’S MINE! ALL MINE, I TELL YOU!!!
So, when this very generous lady offered up her stash, I knew exactly what I wanted to do with it.
I wanted to yarn bomb.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with yarn bombing, it’s basically graffiti made with yarn. It’s a way of creating street art without destroying property. It also takes a lot of covert planning, a lot of time, and a LOT of yarn.
Thankfully, this lady’s “couple of bags of yarn” turned out to be a whole living room-full of yarn.
 |
| There are two more boxes full not in the picture. (!!!) |
I put the word out to fellow crocheters who may be interested and was pleasantly surprised that there were quite a few who wanted to join me in my nefarious yarn dealings. So, we got together and started scouting various spots in town to find just the right spot. I’m sure we looked oh so nonchalant with our measuring tapes and cameras as we continually looked over our shoulders to see if anyone was alerting the police.
Then we started planning, and stitching, and sewing, and getting more and more excited. We planned on attacking our target right before Christmas, so most of the things we made had something to do with Christmas- colors, snowflakes (because Australia is known for having a white Christmas), Santa Claus, mad dashes to the mall to be trampled while trying to get your hands on that one special “IT TOY” of the season, etc.
When we had everything stitched up and assembled, we then had to plan our attack carefully. You see, we didn’t know whether or not we’d get in trouble for this if we were to get caught. It is, after all, graffiti. Yes, it’s graffiti that can be easily removed without damaging any public property, but still, we were frightened out of our minds. This, of course, made it that much more exciting and interesting and, well, FUN. So, I, being the mastermind behind it all, decided to buy the four of us who volunteered to….display our work….some masks and hats so that if they checked the CCTV, our beautiful mugs wouldn’t be recognizable.
 |
| A beautiful mug |
(Although, I did put on a full face of makeup just in case we were arrested. I wanted to ensure I looked really dang good for my first mugshot.)
|
| A beautiful mugshot |
Then we snuck out of our houses under the cover of darkness, and without any support from our spouses. None of our husbands wanted to have anything to do with it- they didn’t want to be accessories to the crime nor be caught as the getaway drivers. Wussies. (Though one of them did offer to alert the others if we needed bail. How thoughtful!)
We parked as far away as we felt we safely could- far away enough to not link our (my) car with the “crime,” yet close enough that, if we had to outrun the PoPo, we had a fighting chance to reach it in time. (In reality, we just had to outrun our pregnant partner in crime. I’m sure they would have taken it easy on her.) And then, we were off. Four women in shiny masks and Christmas hats, carrying bags filled with obviously nefarious goods, trying to be all sneaky by dodging behind walls and humming the Bond theme song….oh yeah. We had this “criminal” thing down.
We got to our destination and quickly started our attack. We came armed with plastic zip ties so we wouldn’t have to waste time sewing, crocheting or stapling our works together (though we did have to sew just a bit....see that fearless masked woman below. She's amazing). We worked furiously fast so we could escape (hopefully) without notice and we had a strict, “NO EYE CONTACT!” policy just in case anyone happened to walk by us.
 |
| YIPPE YI YO KI YAY, MO......oh wait....wrong movie |
Our hearts were in our throats and then we nearly died when we saw a security car with two big, burly Aussie men pull up beside us. I’m not sure if it was the sight of us in our disguises or the fact that we had hooks and scissors and probably were just crazy enough to JACK THEM UP! But they smiled, waved and drove off.
Yeah. That’s right, big guys. DON’T BE MESSING WITH THE YARNIES!
And then, before we knew it, we were done.
 |
| Whew! So glad I left my rollerblades at home. We're in the clear. |
 |
| HO HO HO- get it? Because of Christmas...and HOOKERS. GET IT??? |
We were so freaking exhilarated and high on adrenaline and proud that we scared off the security henchmen that we were literally skipping back to our getaway vehicle.
 |
| WHO WAS THAT MASKED WOMAN?? |
It truly, with no exaggeration, was the BEST NIGHT EVER! I had not had so much fun in ages! It was that night specifically that signaled to me that I was, honest and for reals, finally whole again. It was everything- the planning and coordinating of the project, the conspiracy with other like-minded people, the insane thrills of wondering if we would get arrested and, if we did, the absurdity of telling people why we got arrested….and the only thing that made it better was the aftermath.
You see, our little town tends to be a quiet little town with not too much excitement going on- especially during the summer months when it’s hotter than hades out here and most people migrate to cooler locations during this time- places like the Sahara or Death Valley. So, the next morning when people started going to work and came across our little Christmas decoration, news spread quickly. As a matter of fact, it was THE news for the next couple of days where even the local ABC radio station spent the morning trying to figure out who the heck was responsible for it. They had people calling in from all over Australia (for reals!) saying that they knew someone artsy/fartsy enough to be responsible for it. IT WAS AWESOME! We decided to create a twitter handle so we could live tweet the show and start answering some questions and let them know who we were….without letting them know who we were.
IT WAS SO MUCH FUN!
Our project brought some wonderful Christmas cheer to our little town and even the mayor was excited about it and wondered who these “Hookers” were. Once we knew we had an ally in the mayor, we knew we didn’t have to fear imprisonment the next time we decided to strike. (And there was a next time…..)
It was due to all the secrecy that I had not blogged about this before- I so wanted to yell it from the rooftops, but the secrecy was a big part of the fun!**
So, there you have it. A true, dark and mysterious tale filled with yarny goodness that resulted in Christmas cheer, and thankfully no arrests. And so, yes, Mr. Mayor. Alice1 has finally been unmasked. We have another hit planned shortly.....you have been warned.....
*The other part was that I sought treatment for my PPD and have, thankfully, come out the other side. I truly am, finally, MO BETTAH than I’ve been in years.
**I’ll let you know why I’m breaking my silence, while still keeping my co-conspirators anonymity, shortly…..
Monday, January 14, 2013
So Hott
The last couple of weeks have been quite an emotional ride- filled with different decisions to be made, both by and for us, as well as plans to be made and deadlines to be met, long ago memories to be remembered, and hellish heat to avoid. Don't get me wrong- it's actually been a good emotional ride and has brought some much needed peace in our hearts and minds. Been a little stressful at times, but honestly, "stress" is a step up from what the last few months had brought with them, so YAY STRESS! I'm pumped, I'm ready, bring on the white hairs and wrinkles! (NO- actually, don't do that. I mean, stress and heart attacks are part of life, but getting old is for losers!)
It's been unbelievably hot here recently- all of Australia has been in a record breaking heatwave- so bad, in fact, that they had to add a new color to the heat temperature charts. You have blue = pleasant summer afternoon, green = dude, is that a blow dryer on my neck? yellow = maybe we should vacation in the Sahara to get out of this heat, Red = HOLY MOLY- The entire country just melted into the ocean, and now Purple = the sun has a new summer home in our backyard.
We've been in between red and purple for a couple of weeks now- it's been near 100 degrees at 8 in the morning many mornings- and I'm going both a little stir crazy staying indoors all day every day and yet dreading the days I have to leave the house to go grocery shopping because going grocery shopping in a bikini gets me a lot of unwanted attention. I know my hottness is just adding to the unbearable heat, but it's like people have never seen a 7 month pregnant woman buying vegetables before. My eyes are up here, people!
I've been having a crochet revival recently, first with Little Mister's blanket and now a new one that I'm working on for my new niece. (One that I'm having a serious case of the "keepies" since I'm loving it and I'm going to have a girl here in a couple of weeks and I know it'll look cute here in my house....ummm.....dear Sister-in-Law....this is not the blanket you were looking for.....*Jedi wave*) She's only 4 months old and I'm hoping I can get it done before she's a year and a half, but with my track record, I probably should have chosen some great college colors or something. Why another blanket during an intense heatwave? Because I'm a young hot hottie in her element in this heat.
Narcissistic? Maybe. Suffering extreme heat induced delusions of hottness? Definitely.
It's been unbelievably hot here recently- all of Australia has been in a record breaking heatwave- so bad, in fact, that they had to add a new color to the heat temperature charts. You have blue = pleasant summer afternoon, green = dude, is that a blow dryer on my neck? yellow = maybe we should vacation in the Sahara to get out of this heat, Red = HOLY MOLY- The entire country just melted into the ocean, and now Purple = the sun has a new summer home in our backyard.
We've been in between red and purple for a couple of weeks now- it's been near 100 degrees at 8 in the morning many mornings- and I'm going both a little stir crazy staying indoors all day every day and yet dreading the days I have to leave the house to go grocery shopping because going grocery shopping in a bikini gets me a lot of unwanted attention. I know my hottness is just adding to the unbearable heat, but it's like people have never seen a 7 month pregnant woman buying vegetables before. My eyes are up here, people!
I've been having a crochet revival recently, first with Little Mister's blanket and now a new one that I'm working on for my new niece. (One that I'm having a serious case of the "keepies" since I'm loving it and I'm going to have a girl here in a couple of weeks and I know it'll look cute here in my house....ummm.....dear Sister-in-Law....this is not the blanket you were looking for.....*Jedi wave*) She's only 4 months old and I'm hoping I can get it done before she's a year and a half, but with my track record, I probably should have chosen some great college colors or something. Why another blanket during an intense heatwave? Because I'm a young hot hottie in her element in this heat.
Narcissistic? Maybe. Suffering extreme heat induced delusions of hottness? Definitely.
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Back to the Future
I'm back from 1997, if only for a little while, because, while it's been fun reminiscing about the past, life goes on in the present. But, don't worry (or, maybe this comes as a warning for some of you), I will be returning to the past very shortly and throughout the rest of the year as various memories and milestones of a relationship started long ago mark their places on the calendar.
Anywho....when not looking back (and sometimes cringing) at printouts of saved emails, I have FINALLY finished up a project started two years ago. It's a freakin' huge monkey off my back and the only thing left is weaving in the ends. The many, many ends. Actually, there would be a lot fewer ends to weave in had I not started, stopped, finished, frogged, started again, finished, frogged, and started over yet again.
Oh yes- I mean to say that I've finally finished Little Mister's Blanket o'Love and I'll be posting about it very soon. It's a really good thing we're not living in the worst heat wave Australia has ever seen or anything because, you know, it'd really suck to be 7 months pregnant and swathed under a large blanket just to get something done that should have been done a long time ago. It's been such a relief that I can keep cozy in my house while the temperature outside has been a balmy 44C (111F) for the past two weeks. (Uggghhhhhhhhhh)
Because of the extreme heat, we basically have been confined indoors where are our poor, overworked A/C is pumping 24/7. I actually am very thankful our A/C is working; unfortunately, I know a few people who's systems have conked out on them because it couldn't keep up with the demands. It be really hot here, yo.
One indoor activity is, of course, crocheting and, for whatever reason, there seems to be a huge interest in it right now in my community. It blew me away, actually. People wanted to set up a crochet group where a bunch of us can get together and let our kids play while those with experience (*ahem*) teach those who are interested in crochet...NOT knitting. (!!)
I honestly don't know if there are going to be knitters attending, but it truly has been set up as a crochet group- how awesome is that?!
Actually, I think it could only be attributed to the heat affecting her brain or something because I've been trying to lure her for over a year, but this afternoon I actually taught Miss A how to crochet. (!!) She came prepared with her own brand new hooks and yarn and everything! And, I'm of course attributing this to the fact that I am an amazingly awesome teacher and not at all to her innate abilities or talents, but I'd have to say she has caught on quicker than any student I've had before. You really should have seen her starting chain- it was the stuff that books and poems are written about. (In all seriousness, I have never seen a beginner have such even starting chains, and this most certainly includes moi, the Crochet Queen of the World.)*
So, even though all my acrylic stash would probably melt if I decided to crochet outside with it, this heatwave has definitely had some benefits and I'm really looking forward to the new Crochet/Playgroup we'll be starting next week. (Or the week after...I have no clue what day it is.) Another new friend (who has been a crocheter for a while) will be coming over tomorrow so we can sweat it out under our woolen wares together.
Ok- it's time for bed. I hope you're able to stay cool tonight if you're in Oz, or warm today if you're in the States (or anywhere else in the northern hemisphere). I'll see you when I go Back to the Future!! Err...past....though not 1985 because I don't have a DeLorean.
* Now you'll have to stick with it, Miss A. I bragged about you to the whole world...you wouldn't want to let down the world now, would you? Now you'll have to crochet with me! Muaha. Muahahaha. MUAHAHAHAHA!
Anywho....when not looking back (and sometimes cringing) at printouts of saved emails, I have FINALLY finished up a project started two years ago. It's a freakin' huge monkey off my back and the only thing left is weaving in the ends. The many, many ends. Actually, there would be a lot fewer ends to weave in had I not started, stopped, finished, frogged, started again, finished, frogged, and started over yet again.
Oh yes- I mean to say that I've finally finished Little Mister's Blanket o'Love and I'll be posting about it very soon. It's a really good thing we're not living in the worst heat wave Australia has ever seen or anything because, you know, it'd really suck to be 7 months pregnant and swathed under a large blanket just to get something done that should have been done a long time ago. It's been such a relief that I can keep cozy in my house while the temperature outside has been a balmy 44C (111F) for the past two weeks. (Uggghhhhhhhhhh)
Because of the extreme heat, we basically have been confined indoors where are our poor, overworked A/C is pumping 24/7. I actually am very thankful our A/C is working; unfortunately, I know a few people who's systems have conked out on them because it couldn't keep up with the demands. It be really hot here, yo.
One indoor activity is, of course, crocheting and, for whatever reason, there seems to be a huge interest in it right now in my community. It blew me away, actually. People wanted to set up a crochet group where a bunch of us can get together and let our kids play while those with experience (*ahem*) teach those who are interested in crochet...NOT knitting. (!!)
I honestly don't know if there are going to be knitters attending, but it truly has been set up as a crochet group- how awesome is that?!
Actually, I think it could only be attributed to the heat affecting her brain or something because I've been trying to lure her for over a year, but this afternoon I actually taught Miss A how to crochet. (!!) She came prepared with her own brand new hooks and yarn and everything! And, I'm of course attributing this to the fact that I am an amazingly awesome teacher and not at all to her innate abilities or talents, but I'd have to say she has caught on quicker than any student I've had before. You really should have seen her starting chain- it was the stuff that books and poems are written about. (In all seriousness, I have never seen a beginner have such even starting chains, and this most certainly includes moi, the Crochet Queen of the World.)*
So, even though all my acrylic stash would probably melt if I decided to crochet outside with it, this heatwave has definitely had some benefits and I'm really looking forward to the new Crochet/Playgroup we'll be starting next week. (Or the week after...I have no clue what day it is.) Another new friend (who has been a crocheter for a while) will be coming over tomorrow so we can sweat it out under our woolen wares together.
Ok- it's time for bed. I hope you're able to stay cool tonight if you're in Oz, or warm today if you're in the States (or anywhere else in the northern hemisphere). I'll see you when I go Back to the Future!! Err...past....though not 1985 because I don't have a DeLorean.
* Now you'll have to stick with it, Miss A. I bragged about you to the whole world...you wouldn't want to let down the world now, would you? Now you'll have to crochet with me! Muaha. Muahahaha. MUAHAHAHAHA!
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Oops, I Did it Again.
So, anyways. Let’s get down to the nitty gritty.
(Ok- in order to truly “get it” the way I do, you really need to hear it with the right accent. Nachoooooo!)
One of my friends that I met here (the illustrious Regina who was the mastermind behind the Friday Fibre Friends) moved back to the States last month. She truly has been a bright light for me out here- always upbeat, funny, a fantastic fiber artist and an all-around wonderful person. I will definitely miss her, but I know that she and I will remain friends and I know I’ll see her again when we’re back Stateside.
She emailed me not too long ago and mentioned that hopefully we can do the Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival together one of these years (and then she said maybe I can be pregnant again for it…..yeah Regina….because that was the best part of it the last time.)
Once I pulled my eyes out from my skull after the biggest eye roll ever in the history of man, my reaction was, ummm….YES PLEASE! My sister, Lyteyz, and I had so much fun last year and adding Regina in the mix will just make for one heck of a ca-raaa-zy party. There will be laughter and fun and wool and alpaca and lots of fingering……yarns. (TEEHEE!)
Oh yes- the MDSW festival was ah-ma-zing, but being pregnant and being there isn't on my list of "things-to-do-when-I-get-back-home." I’m pretty sure we’re setting our cap at 2 babies, so by the time I get to go back to MDSW, either we'll be past that milestone, or this is going on record as the longest pregnancy EVER.
Wait. What's that? Oh yes. I'm preggers.
AGAIN.
Oh dear Lord. The whale farts. They've returned.
After the initial shock wore off (and the gas cloud cleared) when we first found out (and no, it wasn’t unplanned- we’re at an age and stage in life where we felt like we should pop them out as quickly as possible- pew pew! But still….holy crap….I’m pregnant!?!), we’re finally settling into the idea that we’ll be parents of two soon. Two under two. Oh man. Please excuse me while Ithrow up scream pass out fart all of the above.
Needless to say, these last few months have been quite the emotional roller coaster for me.
We found out mid-July, the night before we went on holiday to Melbourne (which I still need to blog about). The next day at the airport, the roller coaster started to derail. I went to the restroom before boarding the plane and saw what every pregnant woman dreads seeing when they go the bathroom- especially a pregnant woman who has suffered a loss before. Who knew that such a small amount of blood could turn a world upside down?
Needless to say, our Melbourne trip wasn't the greatest vacation we've ever had. Instead of touring the city, I got pretty intimate with the Melbourne’s Women’s hospital. We got a scan while there, but instead of reassuring us, it actually made us panic more. When we got home, we scheduled another sonogram for one week after our initial scan. That one wasn't very reassuring, either. The very next day, my dad died.
Happy birthday to me.
So, I was battling jet lag, morning sickness, pregnancy fatigue, and a jet lagged baby while traveling all the way across the world, without my Mister there to be my rock, on top of dealing with the possibility that I may have another miscarriage (I was spotting again) and, that icing on the cake, my dad just died.
You guys- I was not in the best place- emotionally, physically, spiritually. Dark clouds, indeed.
I am so very thankful for my friend Ronda who was truly a Godsend for me during this time. Without her, I would have been oh so lonely and may have murdered a family member or two. (Everybody deals with grief in different ways, but sometimes people need to remember they aren’t the only ones grieving- just something to think about if and when any of you lose a loved one…)
I tend to internalize my grief. I become stoic and put on a mask of calmness when internally there is a hurricane brewing. While working on getting things in order for my dad, I was internally preparing myself for the worst- trying to steel my heart against the searing pain I knew was inevitable. I was angry that I was having morning sickness when I was going to lose this pregnancy soon, and why was I pregnant, anyway? I really didn’t want this baby so things just better hurry up and end so that I could stop feeling so nauseated and I could get on with my life.
I really couldn’t wait to get back home. I missed my Mister terribly and I knew he was going crazy not being there with us and especially not being able to take care of me during the incredibly long journey back home. Thankfully, there were many people along the way that helped me with my luggage and carry-on. They saw a frazzled mom with a baby strapped to her front struggling with just getting on the plane- they had no clue I was 2 months pregnant and had just buried my dad. Those people really were answers to prayers!
Still, there were more prayers to be answered. Namely, how was I going to be able to handle another loss so soon after losing my dad? It wasn’t until a couple weeks after I got back to Oz that we were able to get another ultrasound- the one I knew would give me closure one way or the other. Either we would see a heartbeat, or we wouldn’t.
Well, much to my surprise, not only was that little heart pumping away, but our little fighter was bouncing around and waving as if to say, “I’m still here mama! WHEEEEEEE! You need to try this sometime!”
Seeing that little baby in there untied the knot that had been choking my heart ever since I first saw that cruel, red monster that day at the airport. Breath started to slowly fill my lungs once again and I knew I could start focusing on accepting that I was indeed pregnant instead of trying to convince myself that it would be better if I wasn’t.
There’s still a lot of stuff I’m dealing with (and a lot of it has to do with being pregnant….let’s just say pregnancy hormones and I don’t really get along, but more on that later), but, as I said last time, this has let some light break through those dark clouds that have been hovering around me as of late.
Last time around, I blogged so intermittently because I was thiiiiis close to having a nervous breakdown about our upcoming move. This time around, we’re not moving with a newborn (RIGHT, MISTER?!? Because I WILL kill you this time!), so hopefully I’ll be much more present from here on out.
So. Wow. I didn’t realize how freeing it would feel to get all that out. I still have some knots on my heart that need to be untied and some clouds that need to be chased away. But, I must say that I am indeed looking forward to this coming March. It’ll be interesting to see if our new addition will arrive on his/her daddy’s birthday, but I think it’s a very good sign that it’s coming during the month its mother is the most happy. Now, all I have to do is survive these next 6 months…..
Oh dear Lord. Please excuse me. I think I need to fart again.
(Ok- in order to truly “get it” the way I do, you really need to hear it with the right accent. Nachoooooo!)
One of my friends that I met here (the illustrious Regina who was the mastermind behind the Friday Fibre Friends) moved back to the States last month. She truly has been a bright light for me out here- always upbeat, funny, a fantastic fiber artist and an all-around wonderful person. I will definitely miss her, but I know that she and I will remain friends and I know I’ll see her again when we’re back Stateside.
She emailed me not too long ago and mentioned that hopefully we can do the Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival together one of these years (and then she said maybe I can be pregnant again for it…..yeah Regina….because that was the best part of it the last time.)
Once I pulled my eyes out from my skull after the biggest eye roll ever in the history of man, my reaction was, ummm….YES PLEASE! My sister, Lyteyz, and I had so much fun last year and adding Regina in the mix will just make for one heck of a ca-raaa-zy party. There will be laughter and fun and wool and alpaca and lots of fingering……yarns. (TEEHEE!)
Oh yes- the MDSW festival was ah-ma-zing, but being pregnant and being there isn't on my list of "things-to-do-when-I-get-back-home." I’m pretty sure we’re setting our cap at 2 babies, so by the time I get to go back to MDSW, either we'll be past that milestone, or this is going on record as the longest pregnancy EVER.
Wait. What's that? Oh yes. I'm preggers.
AGAIN.
Oh dear Lord. The whale farts. They've returned.
After the initial shock wore off (and the gas cloud cleared) when we first found out (and no, it wasn’t unplanned- we’re at an age and stage in life where we felt like we should pop them out as quickly as possible- pew pew! But still….holy crap….I’m pregnant!?!), we’re finally settling into the idea that we’ll be parents of two soon. Two under two. Oh man. Please excuse me while I
Needless to say, these last few months have been quite the emotional roller coaster for me.
We found out mid-July, the night before we went on holiday to Melbourne (which I still need to blog about). The next day at the airport, the roller coaster started to derail. I went to the restroom before boarding the plane and saw what every pregnant woman dreads seeing when they go the bathroom- especially a pregnant woman who has suffered a loss before. Who knew that such a small amount of blood could turn a world upside down?
Needless to say, our Melbourne trip wasn't the greatest vacation we've ever had. Instead of touring the city, I got pretty intimate with the Melbourne’s Women’s hospital. We got a scan while there, but instead of reassuring us, it actually made us panic more. When we got home, we scheduled another sonogram for one week after our initial scan. That one wasn't very reassuring, either. The very next day, my dad died.
Happy birthday to me.
So, I was battling jet lag, morning sickness, pregnancy fatigue, and a jet lagged baby while traveling all the way across the world, without my Mister there to be my rock, on top of dealing with the possibility that I may have another miscarriage (I was spotting again) and, that icing on the cake, my dad just died.
You guys- I was not in the best place- emotionally, physically, spiritually. Dark clouds, indeed.
I am so very thankful for my friend Ronda who was truly a Godsend for me during this time. Without her, I would have been oh so lonely and may have murdered a family member or two. (Everybody deals with grief in different ways, but sometimes people need to remember they aren’t the only ones grieving- just something to think about if and when any of you lose a loved one…)
I tend to internalize my grief. I become stoic and put on a mask of calmness when internally there is a hurricane brewing. While working on getting things in order for my dad, I was internally preparing myself for the worst- trying to steel my heart against the searing pain I knew was inevitable. I was angry that I was having morning sickness when I was going to lose this pregnancy soon, and why was I pregnant, anyway? I really didn’t want this baby so things just better hurry up and end so that I could stop feeling so nauseated and I could get on with my life.
I really couldn’t wait to get back home. I missed my Mister terribly and I knew he was going crazy not being there with us and especially not being able to take care of me during the incredibly long journey back home. Thankfully, there were many people along the way that helped me with my luggage and carry-on. They saw a frazzled mom with a baby strapped to her front struggling with just getting on the plane- they had no clue I was 2 months pregnant and had just buried my dad. Those people really were answers to prayers!
Still, there were more prayers to be answered. Namely, how was I going to be able to handle another loss so soon after losing my dad? It wasn’t until a couple weeks after I got back to Oz that we were able to get another ultrasound- the one I knew would give me closure one way or the other. Either we would see a heartbeat, or we wouldn’t.
Well, much to my surprise, not only was that little heart pumping away, but our little fighter was bouncing around and waving as if to say, “I’m still here mama! WHEEEEEEE! You need to try this sometime!”
Seeing that little baby in there untied the knot that had been choking my heart ever since I first saw that cruel, red monster that day at the airport. Breath started to slowly fill my lungs once again and I knew I could start focusing on accepting that I was indeed pregnant instead of trying to convince myself that it would be better if I wasn’t.
There’s still a lot of stuff I’m dealing with (and a lot of it has to do with being pregnant….let’s just say pregnancy hormones and I don’t really get along, but more on that later), but, as I said last time, this has let some light break through those dark clouds that have been hovering around me as of late.
Last time around, I blogged so intermittently because I was thiiiiis close to having a nervous breakdown about our upcoming move. This time around, we’re not moving with a newborn (RIGHT, MISTER?!? Because I WILL kill you this time!), so hopefully I’ll be much more present from here on out.
So. Wow. I didn’t realize how freeing it would feel to get all that out. I still have some knots on my heart that need to be untied and some clouds that need to be chased away. But, I must say that I am indeed looking forward to this coming March. It’ll be interesting to see if our new addition will arrive on his/her daddy’s birthday, but I think it’s a very good sign that it’s coming during the month its mother is the most happy. Now, all I have to do is survive these next 6 months…..
Oh dear Lord. Please excuse me. I think I need to fart again.
Saturday, April 7, 2012
A "Relaxing" Weekend...Or, "OH DEAR GOD THE PAIN!"
Oh my wow, peoples. My body is so sore. It feels like I’ve been run over by a steam roller- all my muscles are screaming obscenities at me. I’d love to tell y’all it’s because I’ve been working out so hard core that I’m making your puny little muscles jealous just by being in the same room with me, but I really don’t want to brag about how much better I am than you all that much. *preening haughtily*
Ok, ok. The truth is that I just came from one of the most intense therapeutic massages ever in the whole world. EVER. Holy moly. How does one little woman pack such a punch in her tiny little hands?? It’s like I turned over and she activated her bionic Hulk hands to start kneading the muscles off my bones leaving me a whimpering puddle of goo on her table. A *naked* puddle of goo, to boot.
One good aspect of this is that she validated what I’ve always known: I have buns of steel. She may have used the words “extremely tight gluteals and hip flexors” but we all know that really means I have one heck of a fine derriere.
We started the session with me face up while she worked on my neck and throat area. I told her I had been having headaches so she worked on the base of my skull by sticking her hand up my armpit and shoving aside anything blocking her way. I can honestly say that I no longer feel pain there anymore. I no longer feel anything there at all. I may have left half my skull there for all I know. Ahhhh…sweet relief.
I then had to roll over, self-conscious that this lady was going to see my nude postpartum body, but after karate chopping my neck a few hundred times, I figured her retinas deserved to be seared. That’s right, lady. Take it allll in.
Now. Now is when the *real* work began. It’s like she had x-ray vision and could see the exact spots to poke at, making me writhe and moan in agony. I’m pretty sure she said in her Swartzeneggar voice, “Stop crying like a little girl baby,” as she was getting the kinks out of my shoulder via my spleen. I had to take a double take at her license on her wall- I could have sworn it said, “Hades College of Massage- Beelzebub, Master Masseur.”
She continued down my back, massaging my toes through my ribs, and then she came upon my extremely tight buns of steel. I was so afraid I was going to blast her with the amazingly powerful fart I had lined up, but I’m pretty sure that would have somehow given her even more magical powers from her Dark Underlord Master. I’m not sure what she was digging for down there…seriously lady…is that your elbow? Why is my arm twitching that way? I’ve never convulsed like this before. Wait…what are you…..wait….WAIT…..YOOOOOOU SHALLL NOT PAAAASSSSSSSS!
*trying to do an angry face but too busy flopping like a dead fish*
She then went back up my back, revisiting the places she obliterated before and finding new areas she missed when I realized that she really did draw on powers from below Mordor. I could only pray the Blood Of Jesus Christ over my back as I felt the fire in her finger tips as she went back up and down my spine. She claims they were “hot stones” but we all know that is code for “Fingers of Satan.”
She ended the session by gently placing her hands on my back and neck in a sort of Jedi move telling me, “These are not the muscles you were looking for.” She left the room, leaving me to pick up the pieces of my body that were now strewn all around me.
I somehow got up and dressed myself, documenting the various bruises and missing vertebrae. I’m not sure what she put in the water she left for me to drink but it must have been something waaay powerful. So powerful that I somehow made another appointment with her in 3 weeks.
Dark powers, I tell you. Dark powers.
Ok, ok. The truth is that I just came from one of the most intense therapeutic massages ever in the whole world. EVER. Holy moly. How does one little woman pack such a punch in her tiny little hands?? It’s like I turned over and she activated her bionic Hulk hands to start kneading the muscles off my bones leaving me a whimpering puddle of goo on her table. A *naked* puddle of goo, to boot.
One good aspect of this is that she validated what I’ve always known: I have buns of steel. She may have used the words “extremely tight gluteals and hip flexors” but we all know that really means I have one heck of a fine derriere.
We started the session with me face up while she worked on my neck and throat area. I told her I had been having headaches so she worked on the base of my skull by sticking her hand up my armpit and shoving aside anything blocking her way. I can honestly say that I no longer feel pain there anymore. I no longer feel anything there at all. I may have left half my skull there for all I know. Ahhhh…sweet relief.
I then had to roll over, self-conscious that this lady was going to see my nude postpartum body, but after karate chopping my neck a few hundred times, I figured her retinas deserved to be seared. That’s right, lady. Take it allll in.
Now. Now is when the *real* work began. It’s like she had x-ray vision and could see the exact spots to poke at, making me writhe and moan in agony. I’m pretty sure she said in her Swartzeneggar voice, “Stop crying like a little girl baby,” as she was getting the kinks out of my shoulder via my spleen. I had to take a double take at her license on her wall- I could have sworn it said, “Hades College of Massage- Beelzebub, Master Masseur.”
She continued down my back, massaging my toes through my ribs, and then she came upon my extremely tight buns of steel. I was so afraid I was going to blast her with the amazingly powerful fart I had lined up, but I’m pretty sure that would have somehow given her even more magical powers from her Dark Underlord Master. I’m not sure what she was digging for down there…seriously lady…is that your elbow? Why is my arm twitching that way? I’ve never convulsed like this before. Wait…what are you…..wait….WAIT…..YOOOOOOU SHALLL NOT PAAAASSSSSSSS!
*trying to do an angry face but too busy flopping like a dead fish*
She then went back up my back, revisiting the places she obliterated before and finding new areas she missed when I realized that she really did draw on powers from below Mordor. I could only pray the Blood Of Jesus Christ over my back as I felt the fire in her finger tips as she went back up and down my spine. She claims they were “hot stones” but we all know that is code for “Fingers of Satan.”
She ended the session by gently placing her hands on my back and neck in a sort of Jedi move telling me, “These are not the muscles you were looking for.” She left the room, leaving me to pick up the pieces of my body that were now strewn all around me.
I somehow got up and dressed myself, documenting the various bruises and missing vertebrae. I’m not sure what she put in the water she left for me to drink but it must have been something waaay powerful. So powerful that I somehow made another appointment with her in 3 weeks.
Dark powers, I tell you. Dark powers.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
AND WHOOSH! A Month Disappears
So, wow. I can't believe how quickly January disappeared, taking me with it. I've had so many different blog posting ideas bouncing around in my brain but then, just like *that*, I'm thinking about cheese again. (I think I may die if I don't get a slice of pizza in the very near future.)
We have all been sick this past week which is never fun, but when it's your 6 month old's first cold of his life and he wakes you up at 2:30 in the morning with a croupy cough, it pretty much sucks monkey balls. Although, I was able to have an enlightening talk with my BFF Lyteyz and learned an important lesson in breastfeeding a sick child. Y'all can credit Lyteyz with coining the term "Booger Boobs." I've thankfully not had to experience that glorious benefit of breastfeeding since Little Mister only had a cough. I ended up with all the rest of the cold symptoms so I pretty much feel like death right now. And since it's summertime in the Land of Oz, I don't know if I have a fever or if my head is hot simply because, based on the temperatures, this is the land Down Under Hell. It's been over 100 degrees for most of the past 2 months and I have discovered something very important about myself- I DO NOT like the hot. DO NOT. It is a "dry heat" and so instead of being drenched in my sweat, it dries very quickly leaving me salty and smelling like the wrong end of a dingo. DO NOT LIKE THE HOT.
Luckily things will start to cool down in about a month or so, so I'll hopefully finally be able to step outdoors and go on walks with Little Mister again. (Actually, just checked the weather and it looks like the next two days are going to be only in the low 90's which means we may be able to go for a walk in the morning! YAY!)
I've been on a crochet binge as I'm working on my "Secret Project" and I hope to have it finished by the end of next week since we're going to go on a mini holiday (Ha! I'm so Aussie now!) at the end of the month. We're going to visit Brisbane and the Gold Coast and I'm sooooo excited about it! I've already staked out some yarn stores I want to check out and hope to find some yummy Australian wool which would be great!
For now, I am working with the Lion Fisherman's Wool and I must say I'm loving it. It's my first wool project that isn't supposed to be felted, so of course I'm worried sick I'm going to accidentally felt it before sending it off and then I'll not be published and then my life will be ruined. (Whaaat? Melodramatic?? Moi?!?)
Anywho...I had more to say but now I can't remeber because there was a commercial for cheddar. So. You know.
Ok, y'all. I hope your 2012 is going well so far!
We have all been sick this past week which is never fun, but when it's your 6 month old's first cold of his life and he wakes you up at 2:30 in the morning with a croupy cough, it pretty much sucks monkey balls. Although, I was able to have an enlightening talk with my BFF Lyteyz and learned an important lesson in breastfeeding a sick child. Y'all can credit Lyteyz with coining the term "Booger Boobs." I've thankfully not had to experience that glorious benefit of breastfeeding since Little Mister only had a cough. I ended up with all the rest of the cold symptoms so I pretty much feel like death right now. And since it's summertime in the Land of Oz, I don't know if I have a fever or if my head is hot simply because, based on the temperatures, this is the land Down Under Hell. It's been over 100 degrees for most of the past 2 months and I have discovered something very important about myself- I DO NOT like the hot. DO NOT. It is a "dry heat" and so instead of being drenched in my sweat, it dries very quickly leaving me salty and smelling like the wrong end of a dingo. DO NOT LIKE THE HOT.
Luckily things will start to cool down in about a month or so, so I'll hopefully finally be able to step outdoors and go on walks with Little Mister again. (Actually, just checked the weather and it looks like the next two days are going to be only in the low 90's which means we may be able to go for a walk in the morning! YAY!)
I've been on a crochet binge as I'm working on my "Secret Project" and I hope to have it finished by the end of next week since we're going to go on a mini holiday (Ha! I'm so Aussie now!) at the end of the month. We're going to visit Brisbane and the Gold Coast and I'm sooooo excited about it! I've already staked out some yarn stores I want to check out and hope to find some yummy Australian wool which would be great!
For now, I am working with the Lion Fisherman's Wool and I must say I'm loving it. It's my first wool project that isn't supposed to be felted, so of course I'm worried sick I'm going to accidentally felt it before sending it off and then I'll not be published and then my life will be ruined. (Whaaat? Melodramatic?? Moi?!?)
Anywho...I had more to say but now I can't remeber because there was a commercial for cheddar. So. You know.
Ok, y'all. I hope your 2012 is going well so far!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
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